I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
its not stalking. its research.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
It's just like the Real World with babies
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
