imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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