There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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