I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
