God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
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