I must be too annoying 4 u.
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
