whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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