so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Randomize
