it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Sacagawea was the original milf.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Is Oprah even human
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
