I am in a vortex of obligation.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
