My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
23 Gruesome Scientific Facts That Will Make You Squirm
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences In Dating Men And Women
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.