I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
