Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
