yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
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She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
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No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
3 2 1 whiskey
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
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