A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
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Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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