My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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