just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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