operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
