look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Randomize
