I don't usually arrange sex via text message
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
is it fun? or sober?
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize