Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Use "feeling words"
Yay
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Randomize
