Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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