Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize