We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Randomize
