we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Randomize
