playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
In other news, I just burned my penis
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Randomize