my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize