I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Randomize