i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
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