Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
