the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize