Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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