Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
How does one acquire holy water?
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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