just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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