opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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