ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
