Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
