Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
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