So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Less talking, more tequila
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
