why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
