Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
