so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Where is the hickey?
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Randomize
