I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
pray to the hookup gods
i think im in europe. pls send help
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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