I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
