first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
