it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Randomize