Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
