I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
You're a waste of cheezeits
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Randomize
