Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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