I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
20 People Who Caught Their Significant Others Cheating and Hand Over Some Major Karma
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
33 Memes You’ll Find Uncomfortably Relatable If You’ve Ever Been Through A Messy Breakup
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit